Baby Still Waking Up After Sleep Training?
Why Didn’t Sleep Training Work?
So, you made the decision to do sleep training on your own because no one was getting any sleep and you don’t want to just get through the day anymore...you want to actually enjoy being a parent! You were pretty consistent with what you were doing and it seemed to be working but then it either stopped working or you hit a plateau, and your child still isn’t sleeping through the night. What’s going on?? There are several factors that could be preventing your child from getting 11-12 hours of consolidated sleep overnight. In this post, I’ll explain four common reasons your child may still be waking up after sleep training.
1. You Got Rid of Some - But Not All - Sleep Props
Sleep props are something external that help a baby fall asleep. Sleep props become problematic when a child relies on them to fall asleep at bedtime and for naps and then back asleep during the night. If you’ve removed some sleep props but are still holding onto others, your child may still be waking up because they haven’t fully learned how to self-soothe.
Common Sleep Props Parents Partially Eliminate
Pacifier: If you’ve stopped using a pacifier at bedtime but still offer it to your 3 month old baby (or older) during naps or night wake-ups, your baby will still be reliant on it.
Feeding to Sleep: Even if you’ve cut out nighttime feeds, if you continue to feed to drowsy or asleep at bedtime and/or at nap time, your child will still associate feeding with falling asleep.
Motion Sleep: If you’ve stopped rocking your baby to sleep but still let them nap in the car or stroller, they may still rely on motion to stay asleep.
Holding or Cuddling: If your baby sleeps independently at night but is held for naps, they may still struggle to connect sleep cycles independently.
What Happens When Sleep Props Are Only Partially Removed?
Babies thrive on consistency. If they sometimes fall asleep independently but other times rely on a sleep prop, they may become confused and struggle to self-soothe. Imagine if you were used to sleeping with a pillow, but every other night, it was taken away—your sleep would feel disrupted…and you’d be VERY confused!
How to Fix It
Not sure if you’ve gotten rid of all the sleep props? Ask yourself:
· Is there anything you would remind a babysitter to do at bedtime to make sure your child fell asleep more easily?
· Or do you not leave your child with a babysitter because of something you need to do in an exact way (or a certain amount of time) that you wouldn’t feel comfortable asking a sitter to do? (True story…one mom had never let a sitter put her 23 month old to sleep because her child required bouncing on a ball for at least 42 minutes at bedtime every night!)
· Is there something that, if you forgot it when you went on vacation, you’d be googling overnight shipping to your hotel because you’d be worried your child’s sleep would be affected?
· Is there something you are scared to get rid of…and don’t think it’s THE problem?
THOSE are the things to get rid of!
2. You’re Not Following Routines and Schedules Consistently
Sleep schedules and routines play a crucial role in regulating a child’s sleep. Even if you’ve sleep trained, an inconsistent schedule can lead to overtiredness, early wakings, or frequent night wakings.
Common Schedule Mistakes
For Babies Under 6 Months
Inconsistent Awake Windows: If you’re not following age-appropriate wake windows, your baby may be overtired or under-tired, leading to frequent wake-ups.
Dropping Naps Too Soon: If your baby is under six months, they still need three naps. Dropping to two naps too early can cause overtiredness. Babies will transition to a set two nap schedule sometime between 6-8 months.
Too Much or Too Little Day Sleep: If your baby naps too long or too little, it can affect night sleep quality. Remember that 4 month olds should get ~4 hours of nap sleep, 5 month olds should get ~3.5 hours of nap sleep each day and all babies 4 months and older should be getting 11-12 hours of sleep overnight.
Variable Bedtimes: A bedtime that fluctuates too much can make it harder for your baby’s internal clock to regulate sleep. Remember that an earlier bedtime is always preferable than trying to fit in another strangely timed dinner-time nap!
For Babies on Two Naps
Babies will typically drop down to two scheduled naps sometime between 6-8 months.
Nap Timing is All Over the Place: If naps happen at different times each day, your child may not be building enough sleep pressure for night sleep. Babies on a two nap schedule should have their naps at set times (+/- 15 min).
Too Much or Too Little Day Sleep: If your baby naps too long or too little, it can affect night sleep quality. When babies are on a two-nap schedule, both naps should not be more than 3 hours of daytime sleep and they should be getting 11-12 hours of continuous sleep overnight.
Bedtime is Not Consistent: A bedtime that moves around too much can make it harder for your baby to fall asleep independently (+/- 15 min).
How to Fix It
Follow Age-Appropriate Wake Windows:
0-3 months: 45-90 minutes
4 months: 1.5-1.75 hours
5 months: 1.75-2.5 hours
Stick to a Set Nap Schedule (For babies on two naps). For example, napping at 9:30am and 2pm and bedtime at 7pm.
Keep Bedtime Consistent: Aim for bedtime to stay within a 15-minute range each night.
Watch for Sleep Cues and Adjust Accordingly: If your under 6 month old baby is showing signs of overtiredness (rubbing eyes, fussiness, etc), or doesn’t seem tried enough, it may be time to tweak their schedule.
3. Every Caregiver is Not on the Same Page
If different caregivers have different approaches to sleep, it can create confusion for your child.
Common Issues:
One parent follows sleep training methods, while the other still rocks or feeds the baby to sleep.
A nanny or daycare still offers pacifiers, bottles, or motion sleep while you’ve eliminated those at home.
Grandparents may not follow your child’s routine or will rock them to sleep so they don’t cry, leading to inconsistency.
How to Fix It
Communicate openly with all caregivers about your child’s sleep routine. Writing something down – a cheat sheet with only the pertinent info – is very helpful.
Set clear expectations with daycare providers or nannies to ensure consistency. Ask for daily reports to ensure you STAY on the same page.
Educate family members on why consistency is important for sleep success and what you’ve done to be successful thus far.
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4. Consistency 7 Days a Week
If your child’s sleep schedule looks different during the weekdays versus on the weekend, it can disrupt their internal clock and make it much harder to get into the rhythm of a routine.
Common Inconsistencies:
Sleeping in later on Saturdays and Sundays…
Letting bedtime slide later on weekends....
Allowing naps to happen on the go during busy days (more than ~once per week)
Different diet on the weekends (for example, sugary dessert before bedtime)
How to Fix It
For babies still on 3 or more naps, try to keep up with awake time throughout the weekend.
For babies on two naps, keep to your set nap schedule and bedtime start time +/- 15 min. If you’re out and about on a weekend adventure, try to have nap #1 in the crib and then a car or stroller nap for nap #2. But try not to have motion naps both Saturday and Sundays!
Final Thoughts
If your child is still waking up after sleep training on your own, it’s important to take a closer look at their sleep environment, routines, and habits…and whether there’s something you still need to do (like remove the rest of the sleep props!). Partial elimination of sleep props, inconsistent schedules, different caregiver approaches, and weekend disruptions can all contribute to night waking. Of course, there are other reasons why sleep training hasn’t worked your for your child (for example, a different method was needed for your child’s temperament), but these are four common reasons why sleep training takes longer than expected.
If you feel like you’ve tried everything and it’s not working – or you simply don’t know where to start! – and just want someone to tell you exactly what to do to get your child to fall asleep more easily and sleep through the night, I can help. I’ve been a sleep consultant for 14 years and we can work together to get YOUR child on a better sleep schedule so you have your evenings back to yourself (to binge Netflix, clean, work or just RELAX)…or feel confident leaving your child with a sitter for a date night! Click the button below to schedule an eval call to see how I work with families just like yours!
You've Done Sleep Training, But Your Child is Still Waking Up
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This post is for informational purposes only and may not be the best fit for you, your child and/or your personal situation. It shall not be construed as medical advice. The information and education provided here is not intended or implied to supplement or replace professional medical treatment, advice, and/or diagnosis. Always check with your child’s physician or medical professional before trying or implementing any information read here.
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