How to sleep train your baby or toddler without waking siblings
You survived having a newborn and an older child (whew! it’s definitely different the second time around!) and now you’re ready to get your baby sleeping through the night. Or maybe you never sleep trained your toddler when he was a baby but now things are just going in the wrong direction and every night, the bedtime drama is worse. Whatever scenario you’re in, this post will help you navigate the process and show you how to sleep train without waking older siblings!
The easiest way to sleep train without waking siblings
By far, the easiest way to get this done is to send your older child(ren) to grandma’s house (or another trusted family member) for a sleepover! Even better is if they can stay over the first two nights, because by Night 3, things get A LOT easier.
All you need to do is pack an overnight bag for your older child - and you don’t have to worry about any of the following tips that include making changes to rooms, etc.
But I realize that this isn’t an option for many families, so read on…
Tips to sleep train a baby or toddler without waking siblings
Keep your older children in the loop
If your older child is old enough to understand, have the conversation that you’ll be teaching his or her younger sibling how to fall asleep easier…and they might hear some crying at bedtime or in the middle of the night. Just reassure them you’ll be checking on their sibling and that it’ll only be a couple of nights before things get better!Give them an action to do if the baby or toddler wakes them up (for example, hug the stuffed animal that they sleep with…)
Create a sound buffer
This is one of the most important pieces to making it work. You’ll want to get white noise machines for each bedroom (your baby/toddler’s room and the older sibling). This one is my favorite.In the baby or toddler’s room, place it in between the crib and where the most noise comes from (between crib and the window if outside noises like street traffic, neighbors, etc are louder or in between the crib and the door if noises from inside the house are louder). In the older sibling’s room, place the white noise in between their bed and the direction of the baby/toddler’s room.
But white noise alone might not drown out the noise those first few nights. If that’s the case, I’d try a louder fan in addition to the white noise - either in the hallway or your older child’s room.
I would also suggest a noise barrier for the door.
If their rooms are right next to each other and the beds are along the same wall, you may even consider temporarily moving both to the opposite sides of each room.
Different bedtimes
Staggering bedtimes let’s you get one child down and asleep before the other one gets into bed. If you’re sleep training a baby, she’ll likely have an earlier bedtime than the sibling, so in this scenario, your baby will be asleep before your older child’s bedtime starts.
If you have the opposite situation and you’re sleep training a toddler who has a later bedtime, just make sure your other child has been asleep for ~20 minutes before your toddler’s bedtime starts. Try to time it so it’s not landing at the 40-45 minute mark which is the end of a sleep cycle and the lightest sleep.Shared room options
If your two children currently share a room, then the best thing to do is separate them temporarily. If you have a guest room, move your older child.If you are limited on space and don’t have another room to move one of them to, you can either move your older child into your room for a sleepover (making sure they know this is a one or two night thing so they don’t keep asking for it!) or have the baby sleep in a travel crib in your room.
If you’re moving baby into your room, try to make it so she can’t see you from the crib, so either use a Slumberpod, a walk-in closet (leave door open for ventilation!) or put the travel crib at the foot of your bed (if baby isn’t sitting/standing so she won’t be able to see you).
Start on the weekend
Despite all your preparations, your older child might still wakeup. That’s why it’s easiest for everyone if you start on a Friday night so you don’t have to worry about getting to work/school/daycare and can have a lazier day if needed!
There are so many pieces to successfully sleep training - Download your free PDF to help set you up for success!
Final thoughts…
Every time you get worried about the crying waking up your older child, just remember that it may be a few hard nights to juggle, but running in immediately to get your child to stop crying (so he doesn’t wake everyone else up!) just reinforces that behavior. If your toddler realizes crying at a certain pitch will make you run in there faster, he’ll continue doing that because he’s getting exactly what he wants! And most preschoolers sleep very deeply, so there’s a good chance that he’ll sleep through any crying (especially if you’ve implemented the tips above)!
Make sure you have a solid plan that includes what you’ll do at bedtime, the middle of the night, early in the morning and for naps - your child will learn how to sleep so much faster when you are consistent in how to teach them and react to each situation!
If sleep training with multiple children sounds too overwhelming, I can help. Set up a discovery call and we can discuss options to make this as simple as possible for your family!
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This post is for informational purposes only and may not be the best fit for you, your child and/or your personal situation. It shall not be construed as medical advice. The information and education provided here is not intended or implied to supplement or replace professional medical treatment, advice, and/or diagnosis. Always check with your child’s physician or medical professional before trying or implementing any information read here.